Divorcing parents worry most about the impact of their divorce on their children. And with good reason.
Children’s security comes from their parents’ relationship. When the relationship is strong–children feel secure. When the relationship is rocky–children suffer. Divorcing parents intuitively know this and fear their divorce will ruin their children’s futures.
While the risk is clear, divorce doesn’t have to harm children. Parents can choose a path that protects children–even in divorce.
At The Resolution Center, Patricia Martin-Brown, developmental psychologist, offers Child and Family Advocacy. Through this service, Patty brings her extensive experience to equip parents to care for their children.
How CFA Works
UptoParents.org The process begins with a visit to UptoParents.org. This website was designed by a family-law attorney and his counselor wife specifically to educate parents about how the divorce process impacts children. The website offers a wide range of videos, interviews, and other resources to help parents understand divorce from children’s perspectives.
The site offers guidance on what parents should never do and what parents can do to nurture children even in the midst of family strife. Patty directs parents to resources on UptoParents relating to their particular family situation. After reviewing the materials, parents complete an UptoParents parenting assessment that identifies parenting strengths and children’s needs.
Informational Meeting with Parents In the first meeting, Patty meets with parents to share her insights from the UptoParents questionnaire. She encourages them in their different strengths. She then helps parents create a plan for blending these strengths into a strong post-divorce parenting relationship. She also identifies where there might be gaps and offers coaching on how to fill these.
Meeting with Children Then, Patty goes to each home to observe parents with the children and to meet individually with each child. Vastly different than a typical “assessment,” Patty plays on the floor with the children and naturally brings them into a conversation. Children describe their experiences of their family situation. She listens while the children talk. Through this interaction, Patty defines each child’s developmental progress and how the parents’ relationship may be affecting them.
Strategy Meeting with Parents Finally, Patty meets again with the parents to help them understand the family situation from the perspective of their children. Always conscious that the parents are the true experts on their children, Patty offers an informed outside perspective on nuances parents may have missed–or those parent’s observed, but didn’t know how to address.
Just as often, Patty comforts parents with an assurance that some of their concerns are the normal challenges all children face, not the result of the impending divorce.
As parents work with Patty, they develop a plan for creating a healthy co-parenting relationship and a solid foundation for their children’s security. Parents emerge equipped and hopeful in moving forward.
If you worry about how your divorce might impact your children, The Resolution Center shares your concern. Call us at 317-344-9740 or email info@TheResolutionCenterIndy.com for information on how we can help.